nostalgic and excited

I miss him.
I miss his smile, his goofy faces, his laugh, the sound of his breathing as he sleeps beside me, the warmth of his hand around mine, everything.

I miss who I am when I'm with him, I miss being happy. I miss cooking, going for runs/walks together, watching movies together, redecorating/reorganizing our apartment, planning our future, annoying our cats.

I'm tired of doing it all alone. I'm tired of coming home to an empty apartment, eating alone, watching our shows alone, sleeping alone, waking up alone.

God give me strength and patience, I'm so over this deployment.

I realize that all may sound negative, but I don't mean it in that way. I'm actually just feeling nostalgic and excited for the future all at once.

I'm thinking about the little things I love about him and being his wife and I'm excited to have them all come back to me soon(ish).

We've been talking about taking a trip together when he's back as a sort of second honeymoon, so to speak, to have some special stress-free couple time again which we really need after all the stress of this past year.

I'm trying to think of somewhere cool for us to go that won't break the bank where we could do something we've never done before together. Somewhere fun, exciting, and away from everyone we know. And it has to be in the US because we didn't have a chance to get our passports over R&R so Mexico and the like are out unfortunately.

It's a lot to think about and I can't wait for it, wherever we end up going :)

For the past week, I've been lucky enough to be on vacation in Maui, Hawaii with my sister and dad.

Needless to say, it's been amazing, Maui is far more scenic and lovely than my apartment. Not to mention the weather here is beautiful, I love being able to just sit with the windows open, feel the ocean breeze caress my face, and listen to the lull of the waves.

I've also been running around doing tourist activities like snorkling, parasailing, and jetskiing.

"Snuba" diving!

I've never been to Maui before (that I remember) but I did go to Hawaii (the big island) last year for my honeymoon with Hubby.

Which looks pretty darn similar to Maui at times.

Great.

There are lots of couples everywhere who are clearly on vacation with each other without a care in the world. Their significant other is right there, not overseas in a dangerous situation. They can talk to each other and see each other whenever they want. They get to experience all sorts of fun activites together. They don't have to worry that if something went wrong, the last time they'd have seen each other was many months ago.

And I'm sitting here Hubby-less trying to stay positive and not be all mopey 'cause  he's not here. Which can only work for so long before I get sad or feel like karate-chopping those beezies in the throat so they'll quit making kissy faces. [But that's not very nice]

Lucky for me, it only takes a little thing on Hubby's part to completely make my day. Like Hubby calling me unexpectedly to say "I love you" or having a 30 second phone conversation even though he's running late on his way to work.

I can't wait to have these moments in person again. R&R is getting closer and closer but it feels so far away!